Hearing you and seeing you, Cassie. This can be such a challenging time of year, and it cuts deeper when someone is “there, but not there” as I used to feel about my granny. I hope this lull between the festivities is a balm for you 💛
Thanks, Sarah!! It's been a nice break, but a little too short at the same time. I think I'll gift myself a slow January, too! Gotta make some space for Playgroup, anyway! So excited :) x
I really feel for you Cassie and thanks as always for sharing so honestly. Much of what you shared resonated, even if some circumstances aren't exactly the same.
I lost my dad during covid leading up to Christmas, and I'm still working out my life since.
My family isn't the same as he really was the glue. His birthday was also on Christmas eve and I realise the end of the year is still a bittersweet time.
I do get to have time alone with the cats which I'm grateful for. It is hard to be around merry people when you ache inside. It's no surprise your chronic pain flared up and my body went into flu and ear infection nightmare!
Yet we connect across the oceans. You are seen my friend. Your sessions sound fab! Take care 💜🙌
Thank you so much, Sabrina! I was wondering if this one was a little too personal, but I also feel like they're the ones that connect with the others whose hearts are hurting most, too.
I'm so sorry to hear about the two-fold timing of your loss. I can only imagine the pain. It's so tough when it feels like the world is celebrating around us and we're grieving - though I feel you on the "still", too. I guess our bodies know far more than our minds, which is something this journey has taught me a lot, too.
That said, although I miss the festivities of days gone by, I'm grateful for the opportunity/ability to isolate, too - and spend time with my cat! - although of course that comes with its own costs, but it feels like all of that is feeding the other work we're both doing in the world, too.
I'm glad we can alchemise all this pain and grief into something beautiful and support ourselves and others in our own ways. I love everything you're doing and putting out there and always look forward to reading all your posts. Thank you for being you and for all the magic you're weaving! Xx
I so appreciate your comments and love how personal your writing is. I always wonder if I'm going too much into it but looking back over my posts, I realised those are the ones that connect with people at the deeper level.
Like you've said that's how we're taking what we experience to help others.
I sometimes wonder if I'm screaming into the void because i don't have the usual '40k subs' story, but these direct connections are so meaningful and fulfilling.
I look forward to your shares too and they make me feel like it's OK to talk about grief and loss. And just how tough being human can be at times!
The cat nap days we need are well earned I say! Happy new year xx
Thanks for sharing this, Cassie! Christmas 2019 was my last moment with my mom (the mom from before). It was right before COVID hit and then I didn’t see her for a year and a half. I came home for the first time in Sep 2021 when she was diagnosed. What a shit storm. Sending a big hug! Xxx
Isn't it the frigging worst?! I'm so glad you're able to get back so much although I know that has its own costs, too - both financially and otherwise! I hope this last trip went well. Definitely a shitstorm! Sending you massive hugs too! Xx
I love you Cassie. I love your rawness, vulnerability and wisdom. This was a beautiful piece you wrote here, I felt like I travelled the emotional rollercoaster where I smiled, laughed, reminisced and hugged your words.
You are incredible in so many ways.
I feel you emotionally and from what I understand this is like a place of limbo for you?
I’m wishing you a gentle and easy time & also lots of love.
Thank you so much, Ocean! I'm so grateful for you. Definitely a place of limbo, but one of growth and expansion too - just feel like I'm having a bit of an inner wintering and expanding down rather than out at the moment. I hope you're going very gentle too. Sending you so much love xx
Hearing you and seeing you, Cassie. This can be such a challenging time of year, and it cuts deeper when someone is “there, but not there” as I used to feel about my granny. I hope this lull between the festivities is a balm for you 💛
Thanks, Sarah!! It's been a nice break, but a little too short at the same time. I think I'll gift myself a slow January, too! Gotta make some space for Playgroup, anyway! So excited :) x
I really feel for you Cassie and thanks as always for sharing so honestly. Much of what you shared resonated, even if some circumstances aren't exactly the same.
I lost my dad during covid leading up to Christmas, and I'm still working out my life since.
My family isn't the same as he really was the glue. His birthday was also on Christmas eve and I realise the end of the year is still a bittersweet time.
I do get to have time alone with the cats which I'm grateful for. It is hard to be around merry people when you ache inside. It's no surprise your chronic pain flared up and my body went into flu and ear infection nightmare!
Yet we connect across the oceans. You are seen my friend. Your sessions sound fab! Take care 💜🙌
Thank you so much, Sabrina! I was wondering if this one was a little too personal, but I also feel like they're the ones that connect with the others whose hearts are hurting most, too.
I'm so sorry to hear about the two-fold timing of your loss. I can only imagine the pain. It's so tough when it feels like the world is celebrating around us and we're grieving - though I feel you on the "still", too. I guess our bodies know far more than our minds, which is something this journey has taught me a lot, too.
That said, although I miss the festivities of days gone by, I'm grateful for the opportunity/ability to isolate, too - and spend time with my cat! - although of course that comes with its own costs, but it feels like all of that is feeding the other work we're both doing in the world, too.
I'm glad we can alchemise all this pain and grief into something beautiful and support ourselves and others in our own ways. I love everything you're doing and putting out there and always look forward to reading all your posts. Thank you for being you and for all the magic you're weaving! Xx
I so appreciate your comments and love how personal your writing is. I always wonder if I'm going too much into it but looking back over my posts, I realised those are the ones that connect with people at the deeper level.
Like you've said that's how we're taking what we experience to help others.
I sometimes wonder if I'm screaming into the void because i don't have the usual '40k subs' story, but these direct connections are so meaningful and fulfilling.
I look forward to your shares too and they make me feel like it's OK to talk about grief and loss. And just how tough being human can be at times!
The cat nap days we need are well earned I say! Happy new year xx
Thanks for sharing this, Cassie! Christmas 2019 was my last moment with my mom (the mom from before). It was right before COVID hit and then I didn’t see her for a year and a half. I came home for the first time in Sep 2021 when she was diagnosed. What a shit storm. Sending a big hug! Xxx
Isn't it the frigging worst?! I'm so glad you're able to get back so much although I know that has its own costs, too - both financially and otherwise! I hope this last trip went well. Definitely a shitstorm! Sending you massive hugs too! Xx
Thanks, Cassie! It went well overall. You know, ups and downs.
I love you Cassie. I love your rawness, vulnerability and wisdom. This was a beautiful piece you wrote here, I felt like I travelled the emotional rollercoaster where I smiled, laughed, reminisced and hugged your words.
You are incredible in so many ways.
I feel you emotionally and from what I understand this is like a place of limbo for you?
I’m wishing you a gentle and easy time & also lots of love.
❤️
Xxxxxxxx
Thank you so much, Ocean! I'm so grateful for you. Definitely a place of limbo, but one of growth and expansion too - just feel like I'm having a bit of an inner wintering and expanding down rather than out at the moment. I hope you're going very gentle too. Sending you so much love xx